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He had an edge to him. His right eyebrow was pierced -- a turn-on. We talked for a few minutes. I found out he likes his job, but what's more important to him is what he does after work, including helping charities, going for hikes, spending time with friends. Other men expressed the same sentiment, that they'd rather be doing something they enjoy, skiing, going for a day hike or just hanging out with friends and letting love happen unexpectedly.


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That's the frame of mind I'm in these days. Once my group was called, Brian, the host, told us that we would have three minutes per guy. We were given a number and a scorecard, on which we were to circle "yes" or "no" under the number of the guy on the opposite side of the table from us. If two guys both circle yes, that meant you've got a match. There would be an opportunity afterward to mingle and meet guys not in our group. Have fun, relax and enjoy yourself. I found a lot of guys to be nervous. There was a lot of small talk, but a few guys impressed me with the depth of their questions -- the ones who asked me what qualities I'm looking for in a partner or what I do for a living or what my hobbies are.

I also appreciated the ones who made eye contact. Unlike a bar setting on a Saturday night, where there's often a heavy sexual vibe, these men were talking about their hopes of finding Mr. Right, their interests and careers. There was a nice nurse with a wonderful smile, but he was only Too young for me. I'm I like older men. They're often more comfortable in their skin.

One older guy I talked to who had been out of the dating scene for a while appealed to me. Other than the accountant, he was the only other guy whose name I circled at the end of the night.

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He kind of shrank on his barstool as he talked but seemed very sincere, like someone I'd like to get to know better. There were other guys with nasally voices, a few with thinning hair One had a comb-over. He couldn't have been gay! One guy told me I had a beautiful body, which gave me a lift. I wasn't attracted to him but could relate to his woes about the paucity of available men in the city. So many guys are into partying or games, or are still playing the field, even in their 30s and 40s. One guy noted how San Francisco attracts men with weird fetishes.

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